Discussion in 'Main Forum' started by Alec, Monday, July 25, 2011.
It's not unusual to replace an old addiction with other potentially addictive actibities, such as overeating or wahtever you are doing on the cam. Since your dopamine and dopamine receptors are low, you are simply looking for ways to stimulate dopamine. Hopefully, you will find aplace of balance. Both are counterproductive. As far as porn addiction, strong emotions such as anxiety, guilt, shame, are all registered by the primitive brain as the same experince fear. Fear increases dopamine and adrenaline, which makes using porn more exciting. Both chemicals form stroger memories and learning. Addictions are really just super normal learning. Don't stress about what you cannot control, such as wet dreams. Many young men experience wet dreams during recovery. They seem to lessen over time. Remember that porn caused your erectile problems, not masturbation. That said, the quickest path to erectile health is to also stop masturbating. Could there be a clearer message than erectile dysfunction? Just keep going. We both just need to get through it and the rest of our lives will be better and more fulfilling. What i wanted to ask, how do you think this will affect my recovery? The feeling of having a hard erection though was priceless! I want it back again. Today, i got flatlined libido again. My brain wants sex, my body isn't giving me the time of day. You are not going back to square one no way. Your brain has healed a lot, and this will not reverse it. Maybe it's like losing weight, and you have lost 20 pounds, but pigged out on the weekend, and stalled your diet. Your nerural pathways became sensitized to get excited the same stimuli that you are doing with your girlfirend. That may explain why it is so easy to get hard with her. When using drugs, the addict becomes condition to the surroundings, the sights, the sounds, the rituals, etc. That's why they tell addicts to not go back to where they used, to cahnge friends, to chnnge everything about their previous life. If a former crack addict goes back to his old crack house he gets an immediate jolt of dopamine, which triger cravings, and maybe relapse. In some studies they have found the trigger of their old drug taking environments release as much dopamine as the drug itself. In other studies they placefromerly addicted animals in their old drug taking environment, and give them a placebo and they react as if they just got a big hit of cocaine. Bouncing of the walls, heart racing, along with erectile dysfunction porn dopamine. Your brain has associated computer cam use (espeecially sexua) with your old porn addiction. That's why bulls can keep fertilizing, they get a renewed burst of vigor (dopamine) from a cow they haven't screwed. Your girlfriend is the new cow, your wife is the fertilized cow (sorry). You have continued to stimulate your brain with what it percieves as the original addiction (cam sex). The guys that recover the fastest avoid all stimulation. So it may take longer, but you will eventually get to where you want. Everything you told me makes sense and sounds accurate. This whole thing has been interesting. I started masturbat. I have been masturb. Always seek the advice of your physician or other health provider for any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Only your physician can provide specific diagnoses and therapies. All rights reserved. You deserve a big bear hug! You're in my thoughts all the time, but especially today. Thank you for everything! You may have some ups and down with libido, and erections as healing is not linear. Giving up porn now will allow you to avoid a lot of future pain and anguish. In erectile dysfunction porn, giving up porn will set the stage for attracting a girlfriend. I am one week in, and my libido is starting to feel really dead. I see beautiful women everywhere, but feel no desire. Just an internal logical appreciation of beauty. I can never go back. It's so sh*t being addicted to porn. Their brains have become desensitized by doing exactly what you are describing. Once in a while we see a man with both erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation to porn. Your advice is the exact opposite of what men on this thread should be doing if they want to recover their erectle health. I'm prone to visualizing sex, sometimes with real women and sometimes more like something in a porno. How much of all of this is normal? I've never done a journal before and find it therapeutic,as well as giving me a level of accountability. Thank you again everyone and keep going, you can do this! It is a long road. If you are religious, itâs more efficient to ease your way past the orgasm reflex by realizing that overstimulation naturally leads to compulsion, and reboot. Also, do not threaten yourself, or beat up on yourself if you should have to start your reboot again. Be compassionate toward yourself, laugh if you can, and learn to work around whatever triggered you. I want this to be over with. But at least it's progress. Is this normal? There tends to be a long period of flatlining of libido. You are in the middle of it. Iâve been taught that sex is bad. Only have sex with one person in your life. Donât ever talk about sex with anyone. And so many more taboos. And having a girl excited to tempt me on cam makes it all the more difficult. The next couple of months could be interesting for me. Iâm impressed with your knowledge on the subject and your dedication to help everyone. It is usually the case that once we dispose a serious addiction, we are faced with our life. I need to get this under control. Im gonna make a journal of this and talk to the health professionals. I use to be able to get hard immeditly now its a rare occurence. Thank goodness for this site. Ill start making updates on my progress as well. I cant afford to fail this one treatment. Thanks for being around nd ahving this. I have been struggling with porn addiction and erectile dysfunction for awhile. That said, if you binged on porn, you still would not be back to square one. Everyday you avoid porn is a day the porn pathways get weaker, and the brain becomes more sensitive. Right now, avoiding as much stimulation as possible is the shortest route to erectile (brain) health. You have just pigged out on the weekend, but you didnât regain all the weight you lost. Your brain has done a lot of healing in these weeks. Just get back on the no porn horse and continue. Every time you resist porn, you weaken the addiction pathways, and strengthen the selfcontrol pathways. You should start to experience positive changes soon. Yes you can recover. Everyone who stays away from porn, porn fantasy, and masturbation eventually recovers. Most take at least 8 weeks, but several take longer. Younger guys usually bounce back sooner. Recovery almost always involves a long period of low libido and a dead penis. Many guys report completely dead penis one day, then literally recover the following day. This healing is not linear like a broken bone, or a cut. I've seen it again and again over the last few years. I don't want to even try anymore. I'm a physically healthy person. I really have been very clean with my porn/mb habits with a few exceptions of only seeing my girlfriend. I've had an erection for 20 minutes just talking to my girlfriend about nonsexual things. I don't plan on ever returning. Maybe it will take me a few more months. I wonder if my testosterone is low. I can try herbs again. You can check out accounts at yourbrainonporn. Since all addiction involve the same mechanisms, you are experiencing a loss of your drug of choice, which translates into the reward circuit not getting enough stimulation (you can watch the video presentations on the science at the site). The lack of dopamine and dopamine receptors leads to a decline in lbido while your brain heals the desensitization. The lack of stimulation from the brains dopamine system means reduced blood to the penis. This process of rebooting the brain can take awhile, depending on age and severity of the addiction. It might take 2 months or more, but its good that you got started at 21. It's a simple concept, yet extremely difficult to follow in real life. Some people will reset the count several times before they reach 67 days of abstaining from porn mb. There is no need to force rewiring your brain to real life girls, as that will happen naturally as your brain heals from porn addiction. You will know as spontaneous erections will occur, erections will last longer, and real girls will get you excited. I was getting spontaneous ones left and right, again, not as strong and vital as before, but they were better than they have been. I was able to lie and bed and sort of jerk off to the sensitivity of the hea. I was able to feel again! It was great. Mind you, i never orgasmed and didn't even really come close to doing so. But i was definitely relishing in the newfound sensitivity i had. Expert advises that one should start masturbating when you start watching porno. Do it slowly. This start and stop cycle will teach one's brain to delay ejaculation. Keep main focus on oneself not on the filem. Dry hand dulls the penis or overstimulates causing premature ejaculation. One should keep perineal muscle relaxed. At the time of orgasm it should be contracted to ejaculate. Most guys on this thread have erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation, or the inability to keep an erection with a real life sexual partner. Welcome to our community! You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hope you feel better soon! Time for a celebration. sales online viagra viagra online canadiain viagra prescription required erectile dysfunction medication side effects viagra germany sildenafil citrate 100 mg india revatio in west valley city what is viagra oral jelly viagra sales in canada Also the politically incorrect and unpleasant truth is that many guys who are in relationships are often not attracted enough to their current gfâs or spouses (not to blame them). The chemistry is often not strong enough or has faded. Itâs not strictly a womanâs looks, but that intense primal chemistry that beckons so strongly (often correlated with looks and youth). From a 1 to 10, we crave that 10 intensity, yet often end up with a chronic 4 or 5 situation that just doesnât do it. This is what destabilizes many of us. Porn, while completely artificial like a drug, can provide that peak sexual high and relief very quickly, temporarily meeting our cravings. The intense sexual desire remains. My suggestion (if the above applies to you) is to quit porn in tandem with a serious plan to improve yourself and make yourself more desirable to women so you can regularly get the kind of women/sex to keep you from turning to porn in the first place! Can you elaborate? Remember, if you started porn in your early teens, then you have no measure of what your normal is. None of us will ever be 15 again. Getting harder erections when there is emotional content is exactly how it is supposed to be. Brain dopamine not only controls libido and erections, it is also activated when we make loving connections. Sounds like your brain is back online. Are you asking why you won't get hard with your wife? First of all, have you tried? I have tried abstaining for periods of up to a week or so. I felt a significant loss of libido. I have noticed an overall improvement in my libido and ability to get an erection without porn. I need to go on an extended hiatus from porn and masturbation. The hardcore porn is what really screwed me up. One can try it. It is harm less. It is named as deer exercise as deer is most sexual animal. I used to just look at pictures and music videos, but was also beginning to watch lapdances, stripteases and the like. Lots of nakedness, but no sex. But i've only gone for 3 days atm with this software. I may spend some time trying to get hard without any touching or sexual stimulation. Btw, i was raised catholic and decided to find new answers about life when religion started really messing me up and leading me toward my porn habits and other habits (in my opinion). I don't have answers for why you can get erections looking at normal girls, but not with porn. I suspect you will have a shorter time frame to recover than most of the men we have seen. Your erectile strength will return. Selecting learning,and practicing will have permanant benefits. Yes it's unusual, but it does happen. The physiology behind this is called sensitization. With any addiction, the brain creates very strong pathways for the addiction, whether it is drug or behavioral addiction. This rewired nerve pathway releases more dopamine than normal, creating cravings or in your case, intense sexual stimulation. To weaken the pathways you need to stop the fantasizing. Realize that your primitive brain does not know the difference between fantasy and real (you can google mirror neurons). So if you are fantasizing to porn, it is almost the same as using porn. The situation is actually similar to that of a flasher, who warms up with an intensely exciting pregame ritual before he goes out to strut his stuff. Dopamine is all about anticipation. So a guiltridden porn user is actually raising his dopamine when he wrestles with his soul. That can throw him into an altered state in which acting out is very compelling. It can also make the ultimate payoff (sexual satiation) more intenseâand addictive (in part because it produces more of a low afterward). The bottom line is that as long as thereâs intense inner conflict, there's unlikely to be much progress in finding a healthy sexual balance. The struggle itself is just too stimulating/enticing. For this reason, support groups that emphasize religious guilt can make cravings worse. This isn't like a drug/alcohol addiction where it is clear that a relpase is consuming one specific chemical, and your plan is to never use that chemical again. Porn is diferent. It's not black and white like substance abuse. It's not black and white with sexual stimulation. Ultimately, as your brain returns to balance, you must choose what stimulation you want, and don't want. Your attitude must not be black and white as that can be counterproductive. Binging on erectile dysfunction porn is a relapse. What you did is far from that. Everyone who's visited this page knows it's sh*t. Porn isn't even slightly attractive to me anymore. Because there's something so much better waiting for me at the other end. I want to thank everyone who has contributed to this for showing me that. Some even have slight âpenis shrinkageâ when flaccid. Itâs not real shrinkage of course, simply less blood in the penis when not erect. This period can last for weeks, depending on age, how long you have used porn, and how extreme was you use. The guys who heal the fastest, do not test, although everyone has the urge to do so. I was just excited when she would say hi to me or when we would get online together. We messed around maybe twice a erectile dysfunction porn for four weeks on cam. They were long sessions with porn and 4cam and all sorts of things. I know this is what really messed me up. My body is able to function properly on it's own. The visual stimulus just doesn't get me going. I respond to emotions and excitement. Things work well with my cyber girlfriend usually (but we haven't done anything in a month). We are spiritual, bot not religious. Don't believe in sin. It can be. The rational mind thinks that risk (a threat of punishment, for example) makes an activity less appealing, but the mammalian brain can actually register risk as more appealing. Risky things (like sky diving, for example) raise dopamine. This means fears of roasting in hell can too. Not only that, dopamine goes even higher when a payoff is uncertain. So if someone goes through a passionate moral struggle (or any other powerful emotional buildup) before he climaxes, s/he is raising her/his dopamine. I know it's cliche, but one day at a time and soon we will be there. Start masturbation while begin watching porno quite slowly. Instead to jerking only, do thrusting also. Be aware of a letdown, or an urge to masturbate/use porn following the orgasm. Keep going, as you have a ways to go. Lets hope it's a short journey. Every brain is different. I want to stop watching porn its less exciting every time but why? Fortunately, we have agreed to stop doing visual sexual things. She literally knows everything about my condition and everything about me such as my porn habit. She actually told me itâs good to look at porn and wanted to watch it with me. I would get erections all the timeâ morning, noon, night, car, classroom, pool, tv, anything. Iâm just not back to that level. I think itâs because the emotional connection is lost at the moment. The transformation that has taken place in me has been incredible. I used to be ashamed of many things such as my erections and my body. But it yielded varied inconsistent results (not cured). I have been at it for about 4. This site will give you the insight that caused me to take this approach. Feels like thereâs a little bit of the cart before the horse here. In the interim, we turn to porn. When a hottie finally pops up in our life, we have problems performing. The relationship suffers or goes nowhere. We turn back to porn for consolation, and the cycle continues. I feel i am attracted to the fantasy of pornstars. The truth is that your to caught up on thinking about keeping an erection and pleasing your partner that you forget about yourself. When having sex think about what turns you on, talk dirty to your partner switch positions every 56 minutes. Do anything that will take your mind off keeping an erection and your bound to have a longer harder erection and youll be cuming before you can even take off your socks. I didnt notice any negative effects at first. I did great that night and figured it was the lack of exercise and being tired that got me. This was starting to scare me. Its just not doing it for me. I give up porn and suddenly interesting things happen. I feel better and have more energy. People start hanging out with me more often. I meet new people such as my girlfriend. I only started talking to her as a friend and things just took off. Weight gain has never ever been an issue for me but it is now. As if porn is now begging for me to come back (since the girlfriend has been persistent to do things on cam). And the things we were doing were more teasing and sex talk rather than showing. It would be nice to have morning wood, or get out of the car hard, or random erections i have to hide, or easy erections with girlfriend. I just have a low libido lately. Any more feedback is appreciated. Someday, maybe i'll post my success story. I visit this site almost daily. Job well done. Erections for twenty minutes without touching yourself seems back to normal to me. What makes you think you are not back to your old self? Prime numbers follow a non linear progression which more closely matches the nonlinearities of our brains. This is my 3rd post or so. I've been mostly clean for 5 months. Again, no porn. I feel way better as far as overall health. My erections are better but still not what i expect. Watching her may have delayed my progress. I could also get erections without even seeing her but just typing with her. Again, not meant to be a subtle way to justify more porn usage or not taking personal responsibility for that. But just quitting porn is only part of the equation and we need to go further to achieve sexual happiness and fulfillment. So it's time for me to stop! Day 1 here we come! I was wondering if anyone else was experiencing issues with their penis shriveling while you were quitting p/mb? You guys are great, and the information and experiences everyone has shared is helping so much. Thank you guys, lets beat this. This is waht men have been reporting for years on our forum.
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